If I could get my hands on a FB ad

If I could get my hands on a FB ad reviewer…

I would love to find out where a large group of Facebook ad reviewers work and show up in the parking lot with a pair of pliers and a blowtorch. I would wring each one of their pencil necks until I found the scum-sucking-self-righteous little fuck-face piece of shit that turned off my most recent batch of ads.

(I had a headline that consistently got good CTR that had the world "Sucks" in it. These ads (which have ran off and on in different variations for several months, were disabled and noted as having offensive language and there would be serious problems if I did not delete the ads.)

I would take this little fuck and rain blows down upon him with my bare fists and elbows of fury, all the while disparaging him with various epithets and comments about his mother. Then, when he is on the verge of unconsciousness, I would crack some smelling salts under his nose to make sure he was good and alert before I covered my balls with shit (yes, I would slather fresh shit on my balls), hold his mouth open and teabag him repeatedly with my shittly balls! (at this point in the story, you may be thinking, yeah, but Steve, you then have to clean shit off your balls, but I counter that I would gleefully wash away that shit with the biggest smile my face has ever produced!)

In truth, I had actually let all this rage dissipate last week when it happened because it just goes with the territory of dealing with the inconsistent behemoth that is FB, until I logged in to my FB social account today and saw listed under "Friend’s Events"…

National Fuck Day

Yes, you read correctly, National Fuck Day (August 24th BTW…)

So, FB has no problem whatsoever with letting the un-paying users of FB create any crass vulgar page or event they want and freely allow it to be listed in theirs and their friends’ News Feeds, but I can’t pay them to have an ad with the word Sucks in it?

I had a similar thing happen a few months and an email exchange ensued between myself and one of the pious ad reviewers (of course not the one who flagged me). She was actually very nice BTW, but after back and forth of me fruitlessly arguing that the same word I had used in my ads was used in the title of well over 2,000 different Groups and Pages on Facebook, the conversation ended by her basically having nothing to tell me other than, I dont want to say that there are two sets of rulesbut there are two sets of rules

Does any of this mean I am going to stop using FB as an ad platform? Hell no, theres gold in them thar’ hills! Just needed to vent!

Thank you for being my audience and my friends.

User Comment:
Make sure you get it on video. Just sayin’.

User Comment:

User Comment:
This was honestly the best thing I’ve read all year about FB. I feel your rage, bro.. I feel it.

User Comment:
Im now officially disturbed….the copy you wrote was so good I could actually visualise it all……urgghhh

User Comment:
There’s 2 sets of rules ey?

I think there should be a section where eveyone vents their anger about FB.
Just sayin’

User Comment:
Understand your frustrations, but, why would FB review groups?

User Comment:
You’re such a good copywriter

User Comment:
hahahah GOLD!

This is how i used to feel all the time, i still feel it, but not as often. I was getting so angry on a daily basis from Facebook it was literally affecting how i treated my GF/Fam. I was constantly angry at the gf lol for no reason, so i pretty much forced myself to stop getting angry at FB, the only way to do it was to lower my ‘care’ level for my campaigns. It’s resulted in less campaign creation on a weekly basis, but a LOT less stress.

The Article Published IN 07-30-2011 06:57 PM

Share To More ()